Right... I wish!!!
You'd think I'd be used to needles by now. I can't even count the number of injections I've taken in the last couple years.
So, today I started Fostimon which is injected into the butt with a long ass needle and I experienced what I think maybe was an anxiety attack?
You see, I CANNOT, under any circumstances, ever SEE the needle penetrating my skin, never, ever, ever, ever!
Super S gives them to me, thank God and if for some reason he is not around I go to the pharmacy and there is a nice little pharmacy girl that can give them to me.
So as Super S was preparing the injection today, (mixing the water with powder etc.) thats when i felt anxious as shit. Just seeing that needle, I got all shakey and sweaty- I had to walk away. Ok I am sure it wasn't a REAL panic or anxiety attack, I don't think, but the sight of that needle made me uneasy man.
Now when I ice the injection area just before and then get the injection I'm cool, I cannot see it and I don't feel a thing.
Just the sight of those damn needles make me cringe. I have three syringes in the kitchen now and I had to put them in a drawer so I would not see them as I walked by.
I'm good each cycle as long as I don't watch the prep time if there is any, i should know better. I have to laugh at myself, but I know me, I am a BIG baby, a total punk, always have been.
The only one who gets it really is my Mom. Super S knows and deals with me, but Mom is the one who I get sympathy from, LOL. Sad thing is I have not even told her about this cycle, I want to surprise her when I get my positive beta.
I'm off to bed now, almost midnight. Have I ever mentioned that when I lay down, I think up blog posts? I never remember them, but I can see the title, and as I am thinking of sentences I see them too. And they are damn good too, not like what you read here.
I know, I know, give this girl a baby or two and fast! Night. xoxoxoxox